


Summer

by samidha



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Dissociation, Gen, Hiatus, POV Dean Winchester, S4-S5 I think, Samulet
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-04-30
Updated: 2009-04-30
Packaged: 2018-12-14 03:14:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 489
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11774343
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/samidha/pseuds/samidha
Summary: Dean is somewhere in a grey, grey room.





	Summer

Dean doesn't know the last time he ate. Or slept. He's here, wherever here is--a grey, grey room on the edge of somewhere with a bed and a table with a lamp hanging off of it that he knocked sideways when he got here.

It just hangs there and Dean leaves it.

Dean's not even really here, so what does he care?

Dimly, he's aware that he's burning up. Dimly, a part of him (the part that is still brother, hunter, Winchester) thinks of late May in Texas and heat-stroke, AC that turns on and blows the dead air until if Dean was--if Dean could feel anymore, he'd probably want to die.

But he can't feel any of that, really, and he closes his eyes and he knows the lids burn but he doesn't open them.

He thinks of being Dean Winchester and he thinks of Sam and he doesn't know why. Something else is burning against his chest and it just pushes him over the edge of something and he thinks of Sam riding with him between Bobby's and a Baskin Robbins (Dean Winchester has eaten all thirty-two flavors, in thirty-two states, he's just that awesome. He's been making Sam keep score.).

Sam eats mint chocolate chip and is totally and completely boring.

Dean misses that. For the first time, he misses exactly that about Sam. Sam with his perfect score that he just got on his bio test, Sam who's been smiling his "I know a thing or two" smile all afternoon.

Sam might be the most amazing thing Dean's ever seen when he smiles like that.

It's just one of a thousand things Dean misses, really, but right now it is _the_ thing, in the dead air of Texas in May, where Dean is alone.

In his mind's eye, Sam's smile opens up, changes from secretive and careful to bright and young on his face. And Dean aches, but it feels good, maybe. If it feels like anything then it feels good.

Dean lets out a long breath, and he doesn't know where he is really, or where he's been, but he knows about Sam's smile. He knows--

There's still something hot and heavy against his skin, so hot now that he shivers and tries to shift away and he feels... something... recede.

_Sorry, Dean._

And he doesn't know which Sam it is, if it's (his) bio-geek Sam or Ruby's Sam or some other, new, Sam. He doesn't know but he knows it's Sam and Sam (wants him) needs him (loves him), Sam needs him. Still. Again. Whatever.

Whatever.

Something slides back into place inside of him, the metal cools against his chest, and in his mind's eye he sees Sam, smiling.

Dean stands up and (Sam) something braces him, and Dean (brother, hunter, Winchester) walks out into the Texas heat.

 _Wyoming_.

Dean smiles until his lips hurt and he heads north, to Sam.


End file.
